Week #13 Season XX Dec. 16, 2009

BSFL BULLETIN BSFL CHEWIN CUD BSFL RECORDS BSFL TEAMS BSFL LINEUP BSFL SCHEDULE
BSFL STARTERS BSFL RULES BSFL HALL OF FAME BSFL HISTORY SPORTS TROUGH NCW ATHLETICS
WGA SCHEDULE WGA ROSTERS WGA SCORECARD SAND TRAP KNOWS BOWL RINO BOWL


Tenderloin Bowl XX
Equis entrap Blowhards, 35-20

BUFFALO, NY – The Equis made it dos BSFL championships in a row to become the fourth back-to-back Tenderloin Bowl winner (Bashers 1997-98, Salmonbellies 2002-03, Chiggers 2004-05, Equis 2008-09). Dryden retained the cup thanks, in large part, to a pair of sure-handed receivers - DeSean Jackson and Andre Johnson. Jackson earned Tenderloin Bowl MVP honors by snatching tosses for 178 yards, including a scoreboard blinker, and also zig-zagged to the house on an incredible punt return. Johnson was almost as potent by palming a pair of post toasters among 193 yards to set a Tenderloin Bowl record for receiving. As if that wasn't enough, Ricky Williams packed the pig snout for 108 yards including a goal-line penetration. Dryden produced 788 yards of total offense compared to Big Horn's puny 495.

Good news for the Blowhards was all eleven players in their lineup scored. Bad news was they didn't score nearly enough and only three managed to find the endzone. Cedric Benson ran hard, bumping and grinding for 96 yards, but Big Horn's spread formation receivers only caught aerials for 211 yards. The Big Dawg defense kept the score from getting totally out of hand paced by Andre Carter's two takedowns.




Porterhouse Bowl XX
Sylvesters snooker Eddies, 53-16

MOOSE JAW, SASK. – The cream rose to the top - unfortunately a week late for the Sylvesters. Haglund dominated for a 856 to 628 yard advantage in total offense - but, it really wasn't even that close. Porterhouse MVP honors went to Chris Johnson who carried the casaba to the promised land three times - twice by land and once by catch - among 117 yards rushing (11 yards shy of setting an all-time BSFL season record) and 69 receiving. Running mate Ray Rice was darned near as productive with turd totes for 166 yards, including one to paydirt, and had grabs for 53. And, as usual, Drew Brees came through by hitting a trio of TD tosses among 296 yards. Mario Williams buried the passer twice and caused an upchuck to pace Poody Tat defenders.

It seemed that Seashrein only had three players suited-up. Brandon Marshall cradled celebration strikes twice among 200 yards, Jamaal Charles rambled for 143 yards including a house call, and Charles Woodson pilfered a pass to set a BSFL record for season defensive points scored at 44. With the outcome more or less determined, Kurt Warner back-pedaled, flipping a pair of flutterballs to the other guys among just 178 yards.




Sirloin Bowl XIX
Casualties cream Marauders, 31-4

MULE SHOE, TX – Castlerock played steady as she goes, racking up 631 yards compared to 516 for Manhart. Nothing spectacular, but good enough as Vincent Jackson led the way with grabs for 120 yards and Tony Romo cranked out 249 yards passing, including a pair of toasters, to get the game MVP honor. Cortland Finnegan's pair of pick-offs put the kibash on the Marauders.

Manhart barely had a pulse while only managing one visit to the zone in any manner. Even kicker Neil Rackers was pathetic, and to make matters worse, the BSFL's second best defensive unit just stood at the trough and whistled without peeing a drop.




Chuck Bowl XVI
Rockers repel Chiggers, 30-27

CHIHUAHUA, MEX. – Leading by three into Monday prime time, the Hardrockers still had Vernon Davis to count while the Chiggers countered with Adrian Wilson. Davis, who only caught tosses for 34 yards, managed to hang on to a trey. Wilson made an acrobatic pass pilfer, and could have taken it to the house, but stumbled and fell at the twelve, to return the margin to three. He had his hands on two other flying snouts, only to have them slip through his fingers, and he had his mitts on the quarterback twice, just a gnat's ass too late.

The Hardrockers built a slight advantage as Chuck Bowl MVP Thomas Jones lugged the loaf for 99 yards, including a pair that broke the invisible plane, and Donovan McNabb hit two to tango among 275 yards. Although LaDainian Tomlinson was held to 50 yards rushing, he managed an important goal-line buster.

Chatham won the yardage battle 649 to 499, but lost the scuffle for touchdowns, 2 to 6. Matt Schaub was impressive by flinging darts for 365 yards, including a pair of zone zingers, and Ryan Longwell booted a dozen points 'tween the tines to pace the Chiggers' attack. The dearth of visits to the house took its toll, though, to extend Chatham's streak of not winning a bowl game to four years since prevailing in the 2005 Tenderloin Bowl.




Hamburger Bowl XX
Bellies beat Bashers, 32-29
But drop Hamburger Series, 73-55

HUMPTULIPS, WA – After losing the first game of the Hamburger Series, 44-23, the Salmonbellies came back to post a 32-29 victory over the Bashers. Van Isle trailed by seven under Monday night lights with Frank Gore yet to count. Gore came through for Van Isle by packing the pigskin for 167 yards, including one over the goal-line, to gain Hamburger Bowl MVP honors. The Bellies gained 789 yards compared to 556 for the Bashers.

Van Isle was able to lurk within striking distance by amassing 355 receiving yards paced by Derrick Mason's 94, including a catch in the endzone, Wes Welker's grabs for 105, and Santonio Holmes's receptions for 93. Peyton Manning connected to the promised land four times among 220 yards, but hit a trio of wrong colored jerseys to make the Salmonbellies' comeback a bit more difficult.

The Bashers were bolstered by Adrian Peterson's pair of trots across the goal-line among 97 yards, as well as Jay Feely's 14 points over the crossbar. Philip Rivers launched tosses for 272 yards, but only completed one scoreboard blinker and threw an interception to put a crimp in Spaethcadet plans for a sweep in the series.




ALL-BS TEAM


QB:
Drew Brees
Sylvesters

12 games - 3,474 yds passing - 99 pts (Avg.: 289.5 yds passing - 8.3 pts); 2 time all-BS (2009, 08)


RB:
Chris Johnson
Sylvesters

12 games - 1,569 yds rushing, 380 yds receiving - 118 pts (Avg.: 130.8 yds rushing, 31.7 yds receiving - 9.8 pts); 1st time all-BS


RB:
Maurice Jones-Drew
Casualties

12 games - 1,039 yds rushing, 281 yds receiving - 90 pts (Avg.: 86.6 yds rushing, 23.4 yds receiving - 7.5 pts); 1st time all-BS


WR:
Andre Johnson
Equis

12 games - 1,202 yds receiving - 67 pts (Avg.: 100.2 yds receiving - 5.6 pts); 1st time all-BS


WR:
Wes Welker
Salmonbellies

11 games - 1,065 yds receiving, 14 yds rushing - 48 pts (Avg.: 96.8 yds receiving, 1.3 yds rushing - 4.4 pts); 1st time all-BS


WR:
Brandon Marshall
Eddies

12 games - 981 yds receiving - 36 yds rushing - 57 pts (Avg.: 81.8 yds receiving - 3.0 yds rushing - 4.8 pts); 1st time all-BS


PK:
David Akers
Hardrockers

12 games - 110 pts (Avg.: 9.2 pts); 3 time all-BS (2009, 04, 02)


DB:
Charles Woodson
Eddies

11 games - 44 pts (Avg.: 4.0 pts); 1st time all-BS


DF:
Jared Allen
Salmonbellies

12 games - 37 pts (Avg.: 3.1 pts); 2 time all-BS (2009, 07)


DB:
Darren Sharper
Marauders

12 games - 36 pts (Avg.: 3.0 pts); 3 time all-BS (2009, 05, 02)


DF:
Julius Peppers
Marauders

12 games - 28 pts (Avg.: 2.3 pts); 3 time all-BS (2009, 04, 02)





TOP COWPIES

QB: Drew Brees, Sylvesters

11 pts
RB: Chris Johnson, Sylvesters 18 pts
WR: DeSean Jackson, Equis 16 pts
PK: Jay Feely, Bashers 14 pts
DF: Cortland Finnegan, Casualties 6 pts



WEEKLY BSFL STUD

DeSean Jackson
Equis
Wide Receiver

Earned Tenderloin Bowl MVP honors by snatching tosses for 178 yards, including a scoreboard blinker, and also zig-zagged to the house on an incredible punt return.



WEEKLY BSFL DUD

Kurt Warner
Eddies
Quarterback

Stumbled and bumbled backwards by flinging a pair of flutterballs to wrong colored jerseys among just 178 yards without connecting for any post toasters.



TEAM STAT BULLS

TOTAL OFFENSE: Sylvesters 856 yds

PASSING: Chiggers

365 yds

RUSHING: Sylvesters

283 yds

RECEIVING: Equis

432 yds
DEFENSE: Blowhards 12 pts

BUNWARMER
OF THE WEEK

Ryan Grant
Equis
Running Back
14 points

Relegated to scrub status while Rashard Mendenhall packed the bladder for just 53 yards.



FOR THE RECORD

-BSFL 2009 Most Valuable Player-

Chris Johnson
Sylvesters
Running Back
2008 Justin Tuck DF Equis
2007 Tom Brady QB Marauders
2006 LaDainian Tomlinson RB Blowhards
2005 Shaun Alexander RB Chiggers
2004 Peyton Manning QB Grunts
2003 Torry Holt WR Hardrockers
2002 Priest Holmes RB Hardrockers
2001 Curtis Martin RB Waterskippers
2000 Robert Smith RB Chiggers
1999 Stephen Davis RB Marauders
1998 Terrell Davis RB Chiggers
1997 Terrell Davis RB Bashers
1996 Terrell Davis RB Chiggers
1995 Emmitt Smith RB Bashers
1994 Steve Young QB Marauders
1993 Jerry Rice WR Eddies
1992 Emmitt Smith RB Waterskippers
1991 Derrick Thomas DF Chiggers
1990 Jerry Rice WR Chiggers


-BSFL 2009 Rookie of the Year-

Ray Rice
Sylvesters
Running Back
2008 Jay Cutler QB Salmonbellies
2007 Adrian Peterson RB Sylvesters
2006 Adrian Wilson DB Eddies
2005 Osi Umenyiora DF Blowhards
2004 Javon Walker WR Blowhards
2003 Dwight Freeney DF Chiggers
2002 Julius Peppers DF Chiggers
2001 LaDainian Tomlinson RB Marauders
2000 Daunte Culpepper QB Waterskippers
1999 Stephen Davis RB Marauders
1998 Randy Moss WR Doughboys
1997 Dorsey Levens RB Bashers
1996 Mark Brunell QB Chiggers
1995 Curtis Martin RB Nitwits
1994 Terry McDaniel DB Waterskippers
1993 Renaldo Turnbull DF Chiggers
1992 Ricky Watters RB Hardrockers
1991 Steve Young QB Hardrockers

-2009 NOTEWORTHIES-

Most Player Defensive Points Scored in a Season - 44 - Charles Woodson, Eddies, 2009 / New BSFL Record: Old Record - 40 - Ed Reed, Casualties, 2004


Most Player Passing Touchdowns in a Game - 6 - Tom Brady, Equis v Bashers / Tied BSFL Record: 6 - Joe Montana, Marauders v Blowhards, 1990; Mark Rypien, Fleas v Hardrocers, 1991; Tom Brady, Marauders v Blowhards, 2007


Most Team Passing Yards in a Game - 450 - Hardrockers v Equis / BSFL Record: 504 - Chiggers v Blowhards, 2000


Most Team Rushing Yards in a Game - 315 - Sylvesters v Bashers / BSFL Record: 456 - Chiggers v Fleas, 1992


Most Team Receiving Yards in a Game - 470 - Bashers v Bellies / BSFL Record: 538 - Chiggers v Blowhards, 2000


Most Team Raw Points in a Game - 64 - Sylvesters v Eddies / BSFL Record: 93 - Casualties v Marauders, 2003


Most Team Defensive Points in a Game - 23 - Eddies v Marauders / BSFL Record: 28 - Blowhards v Eddies, 1996


Most Player Passing Yards in a Game - 450 - Donovan McNabb, Hardrockers v Equis / BSFL Record: 504 - Elvis Grbac, Chiggers v Blowhards, 2000


Most Player Rushing Yards in a Game - 197 - Chris Johnson, Sylvesters v Salmonbellies / BSFL Record: 296 - Adrian Peterson, Sylvesters v Blowhards, 2007


Most Player Receiving Yards in a Game - 200 - Brandon Marshall, Eddies v Sylvesters / BSFL Record: 291 - Jimmy Smith, Chiggers v Blowhards, 2000


Most Player Kicking Points in a Game - 15 - Rian Lindell, Casualties v Blowhards / BSFL Record: 21 - Chris Jacke, Wildrides v Blowhards, 1990; Jeff Wilkins, Waterskippers v Blowhards, 1996


Most Player Defensive Points in a Game - 15 - Charles Woodson, Eddies v Marauders / BSFL Record: 18 - Ronde Barber, Grunts v Chiggers, 2006


Quarterback Most Points in a Game - 22 - Tom Brady, Equis v Bashers / BSFL Record: 27 - Mark Rypien, Fleas v Hardrockers, 1991


Running Back Most Points in a Game - 22 - Chris Johnson, Sylvesters v Salmonbellies / BSFL Record: 37 - Clinton Portis, Casualties v Marauders, 2003


Wide Receiver Most Points in a Game - 16 - DeSean Jackson, Equis v Blowhards; / BSFL Record: 19 - Jerry Rice, Chiggers v Hawgs, 1990




Team Passing Team Rushing Team Receiving Team Defense
Van Isle 3,989 Haglund 2,569 Haglund 3,941 Seashrein 92
Chatham 3,891 Big Horn 2,325 Seashrein 3,851 Manhart 81
Big Horn 3,724 Chatham 2,188 Dryden 3,328 Chatham 77
Haglund 3,646 Dryden 2,128 Spaeth 3,283 Van Isle 72
Spaeth 3,578 Skazbat 2,025 Big Horn 3,274 Haglund 60
Dryden 3,554 Seashrein 1,894 Van Isle 3,178 Dryden 58
Manhart 3,495 Castlerock 1,786 Manhart 3,103 Big Horn 58
Castlerock 3,480 Van Isle 1,749 Castlerock 2,841 Skazbat 52
Skazbat 3,406 Spaeth 1,527 Skazbat 2,555 Spaeth 52
Seashrein 2,980 Manhart 1,425 Chatham 2,538 Castlerock 46
Individual Passing Individual Rushing Individual Receiving Individual Defense
Schaub, Chiggers 3,648 C.Johnson, Sylvesters 1,569 A.Johnson, Equis 1,202 Woodson, Eddies 44
P.Manning, Bellies 3,604 S.Jackson, Eddies 1,081 Welker, Bellies 1,065 J.Allen, Bellies 37
Brees, Sylvesters 3,474 D.Williams, Chiggers 1,067 Marshall, Eddies 981 Sharper, Marauders 36
Brady, Equis 3,402 T.Jones, Rockers 1,060 R.Moss, Bashers 933 Peppers, Rockers 28
Rodgers, Blowhards 3,395 Jones-Drew, Casualties 1,039 Fitzgerald, Marauders 920 Robt.Mathis, Bellies 24
Rivers, Bashers 3,077 Peterson, Bashers 1,026 Wayne, Eddies 916 Woodley, Chiggers 23
McNabb, Rockers 2,623 R.Rice, Sylvesters 912 Gates, Blowhards 914 Harrison, Sylvesters 23
Favre, Marauders 2,438 Gore, Bellies 805 White, Bashers 873 Revis, Bashers 21
Warner, Eddies 2,104 Benson, Blowhards 793 Driver, Eddies 848 Ware, Chiggers 21
Roethlsbrgr, Bellies 1,778 Turner, Blowhards 766 Ward, Eddies 840 Freeney, Rockers 20
Willis, Blowhards 20
QB Scoring RB Scoring WR Scoring PK Scoring
Rodgers, Blowhards 103 C.Johnson, Sylvesters 118 A.Johnson, Equis 67 Akers, Rockers 110
Brees, Sylvesters 99 Jones-Drew, Casualties 90 Marshall, Eddies 57 Tynes, Equis 102
P.Manning, Bellies 88 Peterson, Bashers 80 R.Moss, Bashers 57 Gostkowski, Casualties 90
Schaub, Chiggers 82 R.Rice, Sylvesters 72 Fitzgerald, Marauders 56 Longwell, Chiggers 86
Brady, Equis 78 T.Jones, Rockers 71 White, Bashers 51 Crosby, Bashers 80
Rivers, Bashers 72 Turner, Blowhards 70 De.Jackson, Equis 50 Kaeding, Blowhards 79
McNabb, Rockers 56 D.Williams, Chiggers 60 Welker, Bellies 48 Rackers, Marauders 65
Favre, Marauders 53 Gore, Bellies 59 V.Jackson, Casualties 44 Folk, Sylvesters 48
Warner, Eddies 52 Addai, Marauders 54 Ward, Rockers 44 Mare, Chiggers 45
Roethlsbrgr, Bellies 44 S.Jackson, Eddies 52 Colston, Sylvesters 38 Gould, Bellies 34
Ochocinco, Sylvesters 38 K.Brown, FA 34
S.Smith, Sylvesters 38

BSFL BULLETIN BSFL CHEWIN CUD BSFL RECORDS BSFL TEAMS BSFL LINEUP BSFL SCHEDULE
BSFL STARTERS BSFL RULES BSFL HALL OF FAME BSFL HISTORY SPORTS TROUGH NCW ATHLETICS
WGA SCHEDULE WGA ROSTERS WGA SCORECARD SAND TRAP KNOWS BOWL RINO BOWL